Tuesday, March 5, 2013

Cooking and Why I Don't

I would love to cook
I would love to be one of those Betty Homemakers that know how to cook everything
From scratch
Like Julia Childs

But let's face it
I am not, nor will I ever be, Julia Childs
According to my uncle I "burn rice"
Pshhh yeah whatever
I can make some kick ass cereal
Oh, and mac n cheese
Although one time I didn't have milk so I used water
NEVER DO THAT
It was awful

So why can't I cook?
Let me tell you why
It's complicated
Yeah, I get that there are instructions
But seriously, who reads directions anymore?
It takes too long
By the time it's done cooking, I'm over it
I don't want to eat it anymore
So why waste my time?


And why are women expected to cook?
Explain to me why men think the woman needs to do the cooking
Umm... wrong
Whoever I marry will be cooking 
Or will be rich enough for me to hire a chef
Because homegirl ain't cooking
You wouldn't want to eat burnt food every night would you?
Didn't think so

That is all.

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3 comments:

Erin said...

I'm slowly learning myself and it's not too fun. I have about three recipes I rotate around haha. A personal chef would be amazing! Or just a kitchen stocked with every cooking tool and food because the worst part for me is going to get all this shit needed to make the meal

Mrs. Beer said...

I set out when I got married five years ago thinking I'd be just like my mom and be an incredible homemaker, just like that. Like somehow, saying "i do" would magically give me supernatural cooking powers. Then I realized that cooking takes practice, and I'm amazed I haven't killed my husband and kids in the process. All I gotta say is THANK GOD FOR PINTEREST.

Becca Moss said...

Hahaha I'm slowly learning how to cook! It's actually kind of fun... not the dishes though, they suck.